best busride ever
2008-09-18, 4:19 p.m.

Sooo, that least entry about nothing ever happening on the bus?

I have an update. Oh yes.

Oh. My. God.

There was this talking lady.

Well, let me back up.

The bus was especially crowded. Like in a nowhere-to-stand-New-York-subway-smushed kinda way.

And this short but loud and very well-dressed African American woman starts directing people to seats, telling people where to move and stand, asking the bus-driver not to let more people on, commenting on the people who did get on:

“Aww, no, they all drunk-up. They don’t know where they goin’. Aww no,”

And yelling at people to sit down s’more...

“If y’all don’t sit the driver won’t drive and we ain’t missin’ the line-up!”

(The “line-up” is the time where all the busses arrive and indeed line up at the downtown transfer station.)

“I know somebody just farted up in hee-ah. You people confuse me."

“They ain’t no way no how I am waitin’ around fo’ da next line-up for an HOUR wid all you people.”

Yeah, I was sitting right near her and laughing so hard I couldn’t breathe.

Could. Not. Breathe. I. Tell. You.

BEST. BUSRIDE. EVER.

Thank you talking lady.